Agree that poking is not the answer. Neither for Iran, nor for the Americans. But more so for Iranians and allies. Since the attacks by Americans recently have been more than mere poking. Damage to Nuclear industry and other industry and killings of Generals and scientists and destroying ships and.... are all taken together militarily significant. But Iran and allies response is far from significant.
If we saw America leave Vietnam or Afghanistan, it was as a result of many years of conflict and human loss of life. It was a big kick up the back side, no poking there! If we see America not attack China or Russia, it is because of Nukes. A big kick up the back side, no poking there either.
To force out the Americans from region in the long term or more realistically to force a ceasefire, then similar scales of action are needed. Iran needs both to develop a detterent force and to organise much stronger resistance in region.
This will most probably ensure that the Americans will not start anything , or if things go bad, then the mere presence of Nukes will quickly de-escalate tensions back to point zero.
The only obstacle to this peace is the presence of a type of political culture in Iran. One that finds subservience much more convenient than resistance. They say , ".... They complained against me for limiting Iran's missile range..", thinking this will save them. But they forget that Saddam and Gaddafi are both killed at their hands, and they had no Nukes, but Kim is alive and he has Nukes.
It is not the Americans fault. They are true to their nature. It is the Iranians fault. Their culture and politics. If they go down, it is their fault.
Edit : The Iranian youth are encouraged to either shout in the Football stadium or cry in the Mosque. But not talk about politics in a political party. Politics is in reality banned or limited from public life. The only politics allowed is the one that protects the status quo or the rule by the minority. A form of religious dogma, that must remain absolute and infallible. Since any doubt or questioning of this political edifice, will result in it's collapse, like a house of cards. Misplaced and excessive religious dogma, may keep a minority in power, but it can not solve social problems. It can not replace a Democratic political system.
Edit : The enemy will use any excuse to get people to go on the street to demonstrate. They will then cause a disturbance by shooting someone and then use the chaos to stage a military intervention. They will even use the slogan of democracy to bring people out and cause violence. But true democracy needs first the formation of political parties and then agreement on new laws. It can not happen by violence.