I am 40 years old. In the last 5 months I have gone from being just as healthy as I ever was to being crippled by AS. My spine has fused and cracked in several place and it can no longer support my body. My chest wall has fused and scarred to the point I can hardly breath. The worst part is trying to rest makes it worse. All I want is to sleep. The funny thing is I thought it was just a herniated disc when it started, now I know better. I thought I would at least have some years but mine is among the most aggressive the docs have ever seen.
I called out to God for a miracle but that doesn't appear to be in the cards. It's OK, I don't blame him. It was the road he laid out for me. I don't know if I will suffocate or off myself first. I only know that it is not far off now so it is good to get my affairs in order. A condition like this can really test what kind of man you are... I am not as strong as I thought I was. Maybe making that final decision really is strength, I always thought it was cowardice. I have stared death in the face before but I didn't have time to think about it. Now that I do... I am weaker than I ever thought possible.